"Please wake up.  You are in danger.” 
 The soft voice had barely been a whisper, but then, Aruzhan had always been a very good listener. The kindest princesses always are, of course.

She sat up in her bed with a start and turned in the direction of the warning. Past the thick wooden shutters of her window, Aruzhan thought she spied a white horse—or perhaps a stallion?—glittering in the starlight as it galloped through the village.

Then Aruzhan had felt the cold silence settling over her home, an awful, deep silence she had not experienced since she was a little girl...the night her father's beautiful kingdom in the southern mountains had been burned by a cruel, fiery dragon.

“I feel it too.” Her father's voice had startled her. Yerlan the Blacksmith stood in her bedroom doorway. His clear eyes and firm expression made Aruzhan forget all about the gray in her father's beard or the crutch at his side. He still looked very much like the Altai king of her childhood. Of course, devoted children like Aruzhan easily see the best in their parents.

“We must warn the others, Aruzhan. Gather them to the shelter as quickly as you can.” The blacksmith—the King—turned on his crutch and swiftly limped outside, followed closely by his daughter. The princess shivered as a cold eastern wind blew through the groaning pine trees surrounding the valley...or was it a distant roar echoing in the mountaintops?

Now every family needs a shelter. Whenever an ogre, a witch, a dragon, or any of life's many storms approaches, it is a place of safety and calm. Mikhail himself had built the thick stone walls of the Altai Village's shelter before he had left to continue his quest.

“It is a small way for me to repay your village's kindness,” he had explained to Aruzhan atop the church tower one evening while they watched the dancing northern lights.  It is a way for me to protect and serve here even when duty calls me away.”

But when the Princess saw the great beast stretch its hideous, scaly wings over the nearest mountain peak and fly straight towards her like a hurricane of darkness, she wished the mighty dragon hunter had never left at all. Aruzhan had just reached the last house and woken the candlemaker's family to the danger when the east wall of the village burst into flames. 

The small group ran as fast as they could towards the open door of the shelter at the base of the western hills where Yerlan and the rest of Altai Village waited for them. To Aruzhan's right and left, home after home burst into flames, sending up suffocating clouds of dark blue smoke as the fearsome dragon roared in the dark sky above.  The princess had nearly reached the safety of the stone doorway when she saw the youngest of the candlemaker's daughters stumble and fall to the side of the path.

Without thinking--because all good and selfless thoughts become instinct with practice--Aruzhan turned from the shelter and scooped up the little girl.  Struggling back onto the path, the Princess tried not to look at the fiery eyes of the monster as it swooped low over the village rooftops and opened its glowing jaws. Too late...

Dragon's flame shot like red lightning through the night sky, straight for the two girls still running for the shelter. Aruzhan felt the heat grow closer and closer behind her like a terrible wind. Just as she was about to give in to despair, the Princess felt her father's presence beside her. The blacksmith--the King--had leaped from the shelter, heavy aprons wrapped around his thick arms, to block the dragon fire aimed at his daughter. Yerlan's crutch crumbled in flames. Throwing the burning aprons to the ground, the noble man turned and shepherded Aruzhan and the candlemaker's daughter the last few steps into the shelter and the townspeople shut the thick door tightly behind them.  

Any person who has stared down a dragon knows something about courage.  And Aruzhan was as courageous a princess as any you'll meet.  But her heart shook with the stone walls as the black dragon raged outside and her neighbors trembled against her in fear.  The head of the monster's flames had awakened the old scar on the Princess's arm, and she felt hope and trust slipping away, replaced by those awful things we call panic and despair.  

Old wounds can still hurt...more than we care to admit sometimes.

An in that awful moment of fear, Aruzhan heard her own voice, as clear as a bell, the night Mikhail had first seen her scar: Some wounds need time to heal. Some need desire. More than anything else, I wanted to learn to trust again. And one day I realized that whether this ugly mark was only skin deep or reached down to poison my very heart...was up to me.”

Even in their darkest moments, noble Knights and gentle Princesses still have the power to choose hope over doubt, and trust over despair. Ignoring the roars of the dragon outside, Aruzhan chose to put her trust in the sheltering walls that Mikhail built. 

The fear that had clutched her heart slowly melted away, and the roars of the dragon grew more distant and faint.

Yet safe in the shelter, Aruzhan still wished her friend were there.  There are difficult moments in life when knights in shining armor are very welcome indeed.


Now as wonderful as heroes are, the story books teach us that heroines are quite just as important. Even the best knights only reach their potential with the help of kind and courageous princesses. A life with no one to fight for is a lonely life indeed.

And Mikhail was lonely.

He did not know how long he had wandered alone through the great forests after casting off his armor and leaving Spirit behind. His beard had grown long and tangled, his body had grown thin on a rough diet of berries and river fish, and his shoulders drooped with shame.

The ashrooms had long kept Mikhail numb to sadness and despair; they had kept him from experiencing life in all of its rich complexity. Now, for the first time he could remember, he felt sorrow...felt it more deeply than he imagined was possible. For a life that is truly lived to its fullest is hard at times. Sometimes even the bravest knights and the kindest princesses have bad days. That is what makes the wonderful moments of life, so...well, wonderful!

But for Mikhail, wearily rounding the last bend in the road that lead to his home village, this was not one of those moments. Many moons had waxed and waned since he last crossed under the familiar birch gates. The colorful leaves of fall had all but fallen from the trees as he made his way through the village center at sunset and came to a fork in the road. Before him, in the distance, stood the Village Elder's house. A welcoming whisp of smoke curled from the chimney. To his left lay the western field, and beyond that the forest, and somewhere deep in the dark shadows of those thick Siberian firs lay the secret ashroom cave.

Swallowing hard, Mikhail strode past the dark path and approached the Elder's familiar house...his home. Weary as he was from long months of sorrowful wandering, Mikhail still remembered that the best decisions always lead home to family. And when his adoptive father burst from the cottage door and wrapped the fallen Knight in the tightest of bear hugs, Mikhail's shoulders felt lighter than they had in a long, long time.

As you well remember, the Village Elder was a kindly man who loved the Knight as if he were his own son. And love has a way of unlocking hearts and loosening tongues. Mikhail told him everything. The Elder listened quietly as Mikhail related his journey to the far North, his difficulties hunting the dragon, his long stay at Altai Village, his friendship with the lost Princess, Aruzhan, and his heartbreaking discovery that he, a noble knight who fought so hard to be faithful and true in all that he did...had also been a wicked dragon all along.

At this the Elder's eyes glittered, and a tear ran down the old man's cheek to match Mikhail's own sorrow. The bowls of borscht grew cold as the two men sat in silence, the son ashamed and hurting, the father wishing he knew how to help. Sometimes, even the very best of parents don't know the right answers to give their children, though they dearly wish they did.

“I finally understand you now, Andrey,” the Elder spoke softly to himself as he gazed out the window at the cold autumn rain. “I finally understand...”

“My father?” Mikhail slowly lifted his head to stare at the Elder in surprise. “Understand what?”

“Understand why he didn't kill the fearsome dragon that attacked our village that night you and I were in the woods. He could have, you know,” the Elder smiled as though recalling pleasant memories. “Andrey was the best dragon hunter of his day. A mighty knight, fearless and kind. Like father, like son, Mikhail Andreyevich.”

“Vitaliy was the better Andreyevich,” Mikhail answered bitterly. “My brother was the very example of faithfulness and truth. He would be ashamed of what I have become because of those cursed ashro--

Mikhail stopped as though bright snow had been thrown in his eyes. Only he and Vitaliy had know about the ashrooms. And if the poisonous plant had turned even a noble knight such as Mikhail into a wicked dragon, then Vitaliy...

“And now you understand as I understand,” the Elder nodded sadly. “Have you never wondered, Mikhail, why you still carry your father's sword? Why it didn't disappear along with him that night?

Mikhail stared down at the dusty scabbard that hung loosely from his ragged belt...the only piece of his armor that he had brought back with him. “Father never even put it on for the battle,” he spoke softly.

“Because he left your house that night to save, not to slay,” the Elder finished the thought. “To save, if he could, your brother from himself and the monster within him.”

“Small comfort to the monster who has been left behind.” 

 “You are no monster!” the Elder replied sharply.  “Whatever else you are, you are a knight, a man of nobility and kindness.  You must choose to believe that.”

And Mikhail wished he could.  But sometimes it is difficult to see the best in ourselves, even when those who love us see it so clearly.  Without another word, Mikhail stood from the table and, with a deep bow of respect, excused himself for the night.


Of course, sleep rarely comes to a troubled mind. And Mikhail was troubled indeed. Dark thoughts and painful memories drove away the rest that he desperately needed. The evening so long ago when he and Vitaliy—just boys then!—had stumbled upon the red glow of the ashroom cave. The night when he and the Elder had trembled in the forest clearing as the dragon's shadow had swallowed the starlight. Village after burnt village that he and Spirit had met on their long quest. Aruzhan's warm smile atop the church tower under the dancing Northern lights. The spark of trust and hope in the Princess's eyes—so rare for one who had felt the terror of dragon fire. Mikhail's own haggard reflection in the cracks of the ice mirror, where he had first seen the monster's smoke and flame in his own eyes.

Memory after memory crashed down upon the fallen Knight as he lay in the familiar bed, a place where he had spent many nights of his youth dreaming of nobility and courage and daring deeds of kindness and goodness. “Faithful and true in all that I do,” he heard a boy's voice—his own—echo in the darkness. “Faithful and true in all that I do.”

Thoughts and emotions are strange things, aren't they? Alone among all the beautiful creatures that call this earth home, Knights and Princesses can choose what they think and feel. It is among the rarest of gifts, and so rarely understood. For far too many people allow their thoughts and feelings to control them instead...and it often leads to misery.

Without question, Mikhail felt miserable: miserable and afraid and confused. And all at once, he remembered how good it had felt not to feel at all. He remembered how tall he and Vitaliy had stood as the ashrooms cleared away their feelings, dulled their fears, and focused their minds. For months now, Mikhail had been a shadow of the noble Knight he once was, a broken and lost man wandering in the endless forest.

“I am tired of feeling shame and sorrow.” Mikhail hissed to himself as he rose from his old bed in the middle of the starless night. “I am sick of discouragement.” He moved silently through the Elder's house and lit a torch in the embers of the fireplace. “I am weary of despair.” The fallen Knight closed the front door behind him and strode quickly through the darkened streets of his village. His hand tightened around the small wooden box that had hung empty at his belt for far too long. “And I finally know exactly what to do,” he muttered towards the heavy clouds above.

As he reached the western field, Mikhail broke into a jog, then a run, past the old bathhouse and into the trees. The light of his torch glimmered and dimmed as he dashed ever faster and deeper into the gnarled shadows of the forest.

Memories good and bad were plentiful in the Village Elder's house that night. They had kept the old man up as well. At length he had risen from his own bed to check on Mikhail. Parents often do this, you know, even after their children have grown up. It reminds them of selfless thoughts and loving feelings which are more important than any others. In his own grief, the Village Elder hoped for a reminder...but found an empty bed.

With a speed that would impress even Spirit, the Elder ran from his house and through the village. He had learned from Mikhail the location of the accursed ashroom cave earlier that evening. The Village Elder was a very wise man, but even the village beet farmer, Ivan, (who was...somewhat less wise) would have guessed where the fallen Knight had gone.

As the Elder reached the edge of the western field and caught his breath, he saw a tremendous spout of flame shoot up in the night sky from deep in the forest. “I am too late,” he gasped, and bitter tears of sorrow sprung to his old eyes, sorrow for his lost son, and sorrow for their village that would surely be burned before the morning came. And then the Elder began to run once again...straight into the forest.

As a rule, it is rarely a good idea to chase fiery dragons into dark forests armed only with a set of pajamas and a sputtering torch. But the Village Elder carried something else with him as he worked his way through the grasping branches of the gnarled trees. He carried his love for his son, and love is a weapon more powerful even than dragon fire. Love conquers fear and chooses hope...even in the darkest of forests.

But the Village Elder's hope began to quake as the light ahead grew hotter and brighter. At length the old man stepped into a small forest clearing and shaded his eyes against the pillar of fire before him.

There stood Mikhail, dark against the roaring flames, a small wooden box clutched in his hand. His father's gleaming sword leaned against the nearby stump of one of many trees which had been chopped down to feed the bonfire that now engulfed the ashroom cave. The domed roof had already collapsed in on itself, and the gutted cavern sunk deeper and deeper into the flame-softened mud. A dusty red glow from hundreds of wilting ashrooms disappeared under burning wood and falling rock.

Mikhail turned and noticed the Village Elder for the first time. He bowed in respect, and nobility and clarity shone in his eyes.

“I am a Knight.” Mikhail stood tall and grim amidst the smoke billowing from the ruined cave and tossed the small box into the roaring flames.  “I slay dragons...even my own.”

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